I try to have a quiet time every day. Admittedly I don't always succeed-- my mind has a way of getting distracted, be it by a surprise visit from a friend or getting lost in a favorite novel or just by a rerun of Scrubs-- but the older I get, the more important and absolutely critical it is to my life to set apart a single unit of my day for the One who secured an eternity for me.
My quiet times are pretty routine. I usually sit on my bed or on the deck, somewhere quiet where I can be still and let my thoughts slide away from me. I don't close my eyes and bow my head when I pray, like in church, instead I gaze around at the world around me-- pictures of my incredible friends and family, textbooks from classes that stress me out, applications waiting to be filled out, a lake that reflects God's magnificence-- and let my surroundings inspire my conversation with God. I'll admit that I have a fairly standard checklist: family, friends, future, etc., but the more I feel my relationship growing with the Lord, the more I feel myself pouring out my heart to Him: my fears, my anxieties, my hopes, my insecurities. My earnest prayer and praise is that the Lord know the very depths of my heart, my most secret worries and my most desperate desires.
Usually I go through some sort of study book during my quiet times-- most recently, I finished "To Live is Christ" by my favorite author, Beth Moore. Currently, I'm investing my quiet time in my lesson plans for the upcoming Disciple Now at my church (I'm leading sixth and seventh grade girls, so you can start praying for me... NOW). Believing that the Bible is a living, breathing, inspired book, I never crack it open without praying that the Holy Spirit will guide me through it's pages, interpreting God's word that I may apply it to my life.
So here's what I'm getting at: Yesterday, I started out as usual in prayer. I went through the usual line-up, and then my heart started pouring out about my tendency to worry. I am a worrier. Like whoa. I plan things weeks, months, years in advance, and I will go over my plans again and again in my head. Every worst case scenario races through my brain and expands and expands until I am exhausted and discouraged. So here I am yesterday afternoon, laying out my worries at the foot of the cross. Begging and pleading for timeliness in response-- basically telling God, "this" would be really great, and if you could have that done by Friday- awesome. Ya know, because I have it all figured out and just need a little divine nudge to get my ball rolling...
The first verse I see in my lesson plan after I wrap up my prayer time is Isaiah 55:8-11.
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
For as the rain and the snow come down from the heaven
and do not return there but water the earth,
making it bring forth and sprout,
giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,
so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth;
it shall not return to me empty,
but it shall accomplish that which I purpose.
and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it."
How awesome it is to worship a God that can give me oceans of hope and gently humble me at the same time. I have to imagine God chuckling a little bit as I read these words and was silently put in my place. I thank the Lord for His endless abundance of mercy, for His hope everlasting, and, today most of all, for His sense of humor.
I needed this :)
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