i'm a loser, baby

Holy night, I love The Biggest Loser. Yesterday, there were a thousand Facebook statuses demonstrating the love the female race has for a little reality show called The Bachelor.

Blah, blah, blah. Save the drama for your momma. I don't care which Size 0 gets the second-time Bachelor; I don't care who's secretly dating the show's producer or which girls "just happens" to be a struggling actress. I don't need the tears about how they're falling in love with a man that's dating 20 women. Yeah, that would make me cry too, moron. You signed up for this insanity, but I'm sure you had good reason. It's totally logical that you'll fall in love and get engaged in a span of 6 weeks, in the company of 20 competing girls, in front of a national audience. That relationship is bound to work, really... just like the other blissful Bachelor(ette) relationships.

But I digress.

The Biggest Loser is what's up. It is, in fact, the bee's knees. These people are so unhealthy; they are literally clinging to life. On the first episode, a doctor gives them a full check-up and life expectancy. It is astounding how dangerously the contestants are living.

Everything about this show is inspiring. I want to gain 400 pounds just in hopes that I could be on this show. Just so Jillian can yell and spit in my face that "every time [I] bitch and moan it makes [her] hungrier for [my] blood." If you read my last post, you'll notice that I talked about how much I like working out... but all of that had to do with how I feel after the work out. The work out itself is always a struggle. I would love to have Jillian and Bob in my face. Of course, it would also make my weight loss efforts easier if I lived on a ranch and had nothing to do but work out...

I can't wait to see how the contestants fare this season. The before and after shots on the season finale are the most inspiring things I've ever seen. Nothing makes me want to run faster and longer then seeing someone who is morbidly obese finish a 5k faster than I can.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to be inspired by my fat friends and Bob and Jillian.

**Let the record state that, contrary to my Bachelor rant, I have absolutely no room to criticize a reality show of any caliber as some of my favorite guilty pleasures include the Real Housewives and a number of terrible shows on E! and TLC.