It's been a while since I've felt so drained. I haven't worked out in days, so I can't say that I'm physically tired... although, lack of physical activity could be to blame for the decrease in energy... but I am completely mentally tapped.
On Mondays, I arrive at campus at 2 pm to review my case notes and previous sessions. At 4, I have an hour-long counseling session. I thought this would be easy enough for me, but you'd be shocked how different a counseling session is from an everyday conversation. For instance, you shouldn't ask yes or no questions. This seems simple enough, but I dare you to give it a try. Also, try to keep your conversations centered on the other person with extremely limited self-disclosure. This is probably a practice I need to pick up in everyday life anyway, but I don't quite have the hang of it just yet. I'm amazed at how often my immediate response is, "Oh, I do that too!" or something of that nature. Being self-centered is shockingly simple. After the session, I transcribe my notes and self-evaluate. From 6-9, I'm in class. From 9 until bed, homework.
On Tuesdays, I head to campus at 8:30. I work the receptionist desk in the clinic until 4, do a counseling session from 4-5, and head to class from 6-9. 12 hours later, I come home to my attention-starved cat and-- you guessed it-- do homework.
On Wednesdays, I get to campus at noon to review my session tapes. I meet with my professor and a classmate from 1-2 to discuss and critique my performance and hers-- watching myself on tape and then having to explain my fidgets and misfired jokes is extremely stressful, by the way. I return to my receptionist's chair from 2-4, and I go to class from 4-8. By the time I get home at 8:30 and have three days of self-evaluation, work, and class behind me, it's all I can do to think. Tonight, I laid down and stared at Macy (aforementioned cat) for 30 minutes before I realized that I was, in fact, having a stare-down with my faithful feline companion. I talk to my mom on the phone and get about 4 words before explaining, "I don't know where I was going with that..." because my brain is in autopilot.
Now, don't get me wrong: I have a 4-day weekend. And that is awesome. I am in no way glossing over that with my little woe-is-me moment. But, as it is just a moment, at this moment, I am tired and perhaps a little discouraged from all the critiquing and whatnot.
So Thursday is my self-proclaimed "Rebound Day." I'm going to wake up at my leisure, work out, and go out on the town. Look out, Hobby Lobby, it's been far too long. I've printed out new pictures and it's time to do a little rearranging... and I think there's going to be spray paint involved. And maybe a thrift store. I'm going to finish off my Rebound Day with my Bible, and probably a textbook for good measure, at my new favorite coffee shop. Productivity + Creative Catharsis = Mental Rejuvenation. I think I might cook too... it's been too long since I've cooked, and this week I've eaten quite badly (possibly another reason for the whole lack of energy issue...). So maybe I'll cook and live off leftovers for a few days or more. Or at least until someone suggests going out to eat...
I'm feeling better already.
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